Advertisers are using gorgeous men in everyday ads. Casting them as plumbers, delivery boys, or just plain old beefcake models as a backdrop to a household product that you buy every day and keep under the sink.
Oh, advertisers are trying to sell these products. To housewives, for the most part although everyone probably needs a can of Drano.
• Salad dressing hunk. Kraft’s recent Zesty Italian dressing spot features a hunk who bares his chest when the grease from a hot skillet instantly disintegrates his shirt. Result: more than 1 million YouTube views in two months, says Karmen Conrad Sr., brand manager for Kraft dressings. One consumer even e-mailed Kraft that she’d buy it — if the “Zesty Guy” came with the purchase.
• Shaving cream hunk. Old Spice in 2010, put a shirtless man on a horse in its offbeat spot, which emerged as one of the most talked-about ads of the year and made a new career for actor Isaiah Mustafa.
• Cola hunk. A recent Diet Coke spot shows a shirtless hunk mowing a lawn while five female admirers swoon in the grass.
• Drain cleaner hunks. Liquid-Plumr got into the act with a spot for its Double Impact drain cleaner featuring a woman at the supermarket fantasizing about two ultra-hunky plumbers. She melts when one says, “I’m here to snake your drain.” And she ahs when the other adds, “I’m here to flush your pipe.”
Seeing a sexy man in an ad does not bother me at all. Hell, I am a sexy man. What do I care?
Seeing a shirtless man selling toilet paper, or some hunky looking chief in a cheese commercial works for me if it sells cheese.
I am a capitalist. If it sells the product and no arms were broken in the process I say it goes. But that is just me.
We have been through this a thousand times. Howard Stern solved it for us. CHANGE THE CHANNEL if you don’t like it.
Saying something offends you… “Oh, you are offending me” is a form of whining. It does not get a response, give me pause, make me take stock, make me think I am offending you, or anything else.
All that sentence does is let you star in your own sentence.
You are a whiner, lady.
Of course, you can cross the line and be vile, disgusting, and, ignorant, but that’s not what I am talking about.
I am selling cheese here, Madam. Good day.
I am talking about being offended by Armando, 27, 6” 1”. 159 lbs, 2,000 sit ups a day, tall, dark, and very handsome. A male model at work. Hey ok, he is a little sweaty. He is having his picture taken with < insert product name commonly bought by women in the US >.
Welcome to HUNKVERTISING. It is here to stay.
Welcome to BABEVERTISING. It is here already.
Ask any man. The answer is ANGEL. Most women agree. She is an angel. I agree too. More power to her.
Nobody is upset about Candace Swanepoel.
Candace sells women’s underwear.
Everybody loved it when Victoria’s Secret crashed the internet with their fashion show.
Oh, BABEVERTISING is ok?
Do you know a model? Do you know a professional photographer? I do. They work their butts off. They make a lot of money. They earn it.
But you know what? I know food servers and cocktail waitresses in Las Vegas who put up with dumb ass drunks who misbehave and I respect that they work their asses off and earn a living to feed their kids and pay their bills. What is the difference between a blackjack dealer and a super model?
All these folks were born naked. So was Armando. So was the executive. So was the housewife. So were you. So why is so Hunkvertising so offensive?
There is a movement to stop Hunkvertising. A small group of money grubbers are telling women in the US they are offended by our man, our sweaty, shirtless man, Armando, selling macaroni and cheese. Can you believe this?
My very smart friend always says… “Follow the money” anytime there is a controversy in which two parties want to drink the same glass of water.
Guess what? Wanna know how offended these pure of thought American housewives are? So offended that they are organized and don’t even know it. Remember I said follow the money? Well let me tell you.
I am not going to promote the money grubbing association folks by naming their organization since they are not returning the favor. But here goes.
The idea is to create an uproar. Get people upset about whatever THEY choose. Move public opinion. Target wallets. Cull a group of people. Create and apply peer pressure. The pressure of societal expectation and moral behavior. The pressure of family values and decency. Don’t bother to define the values, that takes too long and opens it up for debate. Play on emotion. Impulse rules the day. PLAY ON EMOTION.
Are they in an uproar yet? How many are in an uproar? Good! They are in an uproar. The uproar is created. The uproar is designed to hit the target demo, in this case conservative housewives. The uproar is designed to get THEIR panties in a wad then get them to take some sort of action. (donate money)
It is insidious in the beginning. This group gets your attention by protesting TV ads that use the word DAMN for instance. Since a TV commercial is common to millions of households, there is a good chance that their message will spread and social media will spread the word.
There is a well known credit card company paying a famous actor. During the original take… He says DAMN. About a month or so later the commercial still runs but without the word DAMN. Guess who?
This organization went on an email writing campaign to pressure the advertiser to edit the commercial BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T LIKE IT.
THEY SAID, THEY DIDN’T WANT THEIR KIDS TO GROW UP THAT WAY… YOU KNOW, HEARING THE WORD “DAMN”!
So they send you to a website. It is a plain website. You click a button saying – send an email to the advertiser…to complain about the naughty word…”damn”… in this case.
Oh wait… I missed something. DONATE FIRST… remember? we follow the money, don’t we? Yes, donate first, then send your email… no, no, don’t send your email. Send our email. It is written out for you so you don’t express your opinion, you express ours, you are just the sender. If you edit the boiler plate, they block the send. The advertiser never hears what you have to say. Just what the money grubbers want to say. Sounds like bullshit to me.
See the problem here American housewife? Not only are your panties in a wad over macaroni and cheese, Armando, and all these family values you are told are being trampled by advertisers… (I researched the divorce rates, marriage infidelity stats, drug use numbers, etc.) but a faceless organization you just donated $15 to is now telling you what to say in your protest letter over the use of the word DAMN because it is naughty.
You have kids. You send them to school. We are not talking about how many kids in American High Schools can pass a drug test… we are protesting the word DAMN used in a credit card commercial. The word F*&% is used so much on cable that the bleepers shouldn’t even bother since it is heard so often they can’t seem to bleep them all. But that is okay. It is cable. The expectations are lower.
You have no idea how your $15 lousy bucks is being used, who has it, or where it is now, or where it will be tomorrow. Still don’t see the problem?
So now I am really interested. I looked into it more. Peeling back the boilerplate email complaining about naughty commercials. The website is run by a giant religious organization I have never heard of. I tried to dial in more and more and found that there is powerful lobby in Washington DC attached to it. Follow the money.
Hmmm. I have heard that these operations take money from well meaning people. Move it around a little, then funnel it back to lobbyists who use it to gain influence.
It is sort of a big, invisible machine, going full power right before your very eyes. You can’t stop it.
And you thought you were upset about Armando?
Keep your $15.
Enjoy shirtless Armando for the hunk he is.
Go buy some macaroni.
CHANGE THE CHANNEL if you don’t like the message.
Hey! Where you going with that Victoria’s Secret catalog?